131 Some time later, this happened: Absalom, David's son, had a sister who was very attractive. Her name was Tamar. Amnon, also David's son, was in love with her. 2 Amnon was obsessed with his sister Tamar to the point of making himself sick over her. She was a virgin, so he couldn't see how he could get his hands on her. 3 Amnon had a good friend, Jonadab, the son of David's brother Shimeah. Jonadab was exceptionally streetwise. 4 He said to Amnon, "Why are you moping around like this, day after day - you, the son of the king! Tell me what's eating at you." "In a word, Tamar," said Amnon. "My brother Absalom's sister. I'm in love with her." 5 "Here's what you do," said Jonadab. "Go to bed and pretend you're sick. When your father comes to visit you, say, 'Have my sister Tamar come and prepare some supper for me here where I can watch her and she can feed me.'" 6 So Amnon took to his bed and acted sick. When the king came to visit, Amnon said, "Would you do me a favor? Have my sister Tamar come and make some nourishing dumplings here where I can watch her and be fed by her." 7 David sent word to Tamar who was home at the time: "Go to the house of your brother Amnon and prepare a meal for him." 8 So Tamar went to her brother Amnon's house. She took dough, kneaded it, formed it into dumplings, and cooked them while he watched from his bed. 9 But when she took the cooking pot and served him, he wouldn't eat. 10 Then he said to Tamar, "Bring the food into my bedroom, where we can eat in privacy." She took the nourishing dumplings she had prepared and brought them to her brother Amnon in his bedroom. 11 But when she got ready to feed him, he grabbed her and said, "Come to bed with me, sister!" 12 "No, brother!" she said, "Don't hurt me! This kind of thing isn't done in Israel! Don't do this terrible thing! 13 Where could I ever show my face? And you - you'll be out on the street in disgrace. Oh, please! Speak to the king - he'll let you marry me." 14 But he wouldn't listen. Being much stronger than she, he raped her. 15 No sooner had Amnon raped her than he hated her - an immense hatred. The hatred that he felt for her was greater than the love he'd had for her. "Get up," he said, "and get out!" 16 "Oh no, brother," she said. "Please! This is an even worse evil than what you just did to me!" 17 He called for his valet. "Get rid of this woman. Get her out of my sight! And lock the door after her." 18 The valet threw her out and locked the door behind her. 19 Tamar poured ashes on her head, then she ripped the long-sleeved gown, held her head in her hands, and walked away, sobbing as she went.
20 Her brother Absalom said to her, "Has your brother Amnon had his way with you? Now, my dear sister, let's keep it quiet - a family matter. He is, after all, your brother. Don't take this so hard." Tamar lived in her brother Absalom's home, bitter and desolate.
21 King David heard the whole story and was enraged, 22 but he didn't discipline Amnon. David doted on him because he was his firstborn. Absalom quit speaking to Amnon - not a word, whether good or bad - because he hated him for violating his sister Tamar. 23 Two years went by. One day Absalom threw a sheep-shearing party in Baal Hazor in the vicinity of Ephraim and invited all the king's sons. 24 He also went to the king and invited him. "Look, I'm throwing a sheep-shearing party. Come, and bring your servants." 25 But the king said, "No, son - not this time, and not the whole household. We'd just be a burden to you." Absalom pushed, but David wouldn't budge. But he did give him his blessing. 26 Then Absalom said, "Well, if you won't come, at least let my brother Amnon come." 27 But Absalom was so insistent that he gave in and let Amnon and all the rest of the king's sons go. 28 Absalom prepared a banquet fit for a king. Then he instructed his servants, "Look sharp, now. When Amnon is well into the sauce and feeling no pain, and I give the order 'Strike Amnon,' kill him. And don't be afraid - I'm the one giving the command. Courage! You can do it!" 29 Absalom's servants did to Amnon exactly what their master ordered. All the king's sons got out as fast as they could, jumped on their mules, and rode off.
30 While they were still on the road, a rumor came to the king: "Absalom just killed all the king's sons - not one is left!" 31 The king stood up, ripped his clothes to shreds, and threw himself on the floor. All his servants who were standing around at the time did the same. 32 Just then, Jonadab, his brother Shimeah's son, stepped up. "My master must not think that all the young men, the king's sons, are dead. Only Amnon is dead. This happened because of Absalom's outrage since the day that Amnon violated his sister Tamar.
Matthew Henry's Commentary on 2 Samuel 13:1-32
Commentary on 2 Samuel 13:1-20
(Read 2 Samuel 13:1-20)
From henceforward David was followed with one trouble after another. Adultery and murder were David's sins, the like sins among his children were the beginnings of his punishment: he was too indulgent to his children. Thus David might trace the sins of his children to his own misconduct, which must have made the anguish of the chastisement worse. Let no one ever expect good treatment from those who are capable of attempting their seduction; but it is better to suffer the greatest wrong than to commit the least sin.
Commentary on 2 Samuel 13:21-29
(Read 2 Samuel 13:21-29)
Observe the aggravations of Absalom's sin: he would have Ammon slain, when least fit to go out of the world. He engaged his servants in the guilt. Those servants are ill-taught who obey wicked masters, against God's commands. Indulged children always prove crosses to godly parents, whose foolish love leads them to neglect their duty to God.
Commentary on 2 Samuel 13:30-39
(Read 2 Samuel 13:30-39)
Jonadab was as guilty of Ammon's death, as of his sin; such false friends do they prove, who counsel us to do wickedly. Instead of loathing Absalom as a murderer, David, after a time, longed to go forth to him. This was David's infirmity: God saw something in his heart that made a difference, else we should have thought that he, as much as Eli, honoured his sons more than God.