Loving your enemies. It’s one of those commands that feels good in theory—a hallmark of Christ’s teaching that distinguishes His followers. But let’s be real: it’s far easier to nod in agreement with the idea than to put it into practice. What does it truly mean to love your enemies? And just as importantly, what does it not mean?
To fully grasp this radical concept, we need to delve into the depth of Scripture, examine Christ’s example, and confront our own assumptions. Spoiler alert: loving your enemies is less about your feelings and more about your faithfulness.
The Radical Call of Loving Your Enemies
Jesus’ command to love your enemies appears in Matthew 5:43-44, NKJV:
“You have heard that it was said, ‘You shall love your neighbor and hate your enemy.’ But I say to you, love your enemies, bless those who curse you, do good to those who hate you, and pray for those who spitefully use you and persecute you.”
This teaching is revolutionary. Jesus dismantles the "I’ll love those who love me" mindset and pushes us into a higher plane of Kingdom living. Loving our enemies isn’t just an add-on to our Christian faith—it’s central to it. It reflects the nature of God Himself, who causes the sun to rise on both the evil and the good (Matthew 5:45, NKJV).
But let’s be clear: loving your enemies is not a suggestion. It’s a command. And commands from God are always for our good and His glory.
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What Does it Really Mean to Love Your Enemies?
1. Recognizing Their Humanity
First and foremost, loving your enemies means seeing them as image-bearers of God. Genesis 1:27, NKJV reminds us that every human being is made in the image of God. That includes the coworker who undermines you, the friend who betrayed you, and yes, even those who actively oppose your faith.
“So God created man in His own image; in the image of God He created him; male and female He created them.”
Loving your enemies starts with the recognition that they, too, are people in need of God’s grace. It’s acknowledging that, but for the mercy of God, we could be in their shoes. Let’s face it: sometimes, the only thing separating "us" from "them" is grace.
2. Choosing to Forgive
Forgiveness is a cornerstone of loving our enemies. Ephesians 4:32, NKJV calls us to “be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”
“And be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, even as God in Christ forgave you.”
Loving your enemies doesn’t mean ignoring the hurt they caused or pretending it didn’t happen. Instead, it means releasing the bitterness, refusing to hold grudges, and trusting God to bring justice in His time.
Forgiveness doesn’t excuse sin, but it frees you from being chained to it. Don’t let the poison of unforgiveness corrode your soul while your enemy moves on unaware.
3. Blessing, Not Cursing
When Jesus tells us to bless those who curse us, He is asking us to break the cycle of retaliation. Romans 12:14, NKJV echoes this:
“Bless those who persecute you; bless and do not curse.”
To bless someone means to speak well of them and to desire God’s best for them. This doesn’t come naturally. Our default response is often to lash out. But when we bless instead of curse, we disarm hostility and allow room for God to work. Let’s call it what it is: loving your enemies is spiritual warfare, and blessing them is a weapon of mass disruption.
4. Praying for Them
Praying for your enemies may be one of the hardest aspects of this command, but it’s also one of the most powerful. When you pray for someone who has wronged you, your heart begins to soften. You start to see them through God’s eyes, and you open the door for Him to move in their lives and yours.
Interceding for your enemies is an act of faith. It says, “God, I trust You to handle this situation far better than I ever could.” Spoiler: He always does.
5. Doing Good to Them
Finally, loving your enemies involves tangible acts of kindness. Romans 12:20, NKJV puts it this way:
“If your enemy is hungry, feed him; if he is thirsty, give him a drink.”
This kind of love is active, not passive. It’s not just about avoiding retaliation; it’s about seeking their good. Love isn’t lip service; it’s life service.
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What Loving Your Enemies Does NOT Mean
1. Approving of Their Sin
Loving your enemies does not mean condoning their actions. God’s love is holy and just, and so should ours be. When someone acts sinfully, love does not excuse or enable their behavior. Instead, it seeks their ultimate good, which often includes repentance and transformation.
2. Becoming a Doormat
Some people equate loving your enemies with passivity. But Jesus’ command is not an invitation to tolerate abuse or injustice. Loving your enemies doesn’t mean allowing them to trample over you. There are times when setting boundaries is both wise and necessary.
Jesus Himself modeled this balance. While He willingly endured the cross for our sake, He also confronted wrongdoing, rebuked hypocrisy, and spoke the truth in love.
3. Ignoring Accountability
Love seeks the good of others, and that includes holding them accountable. In Matthew 18:15-17, NKJV, Jesus outlines a process for addressing sin within the community. Loving your enemies doesn’t mean sweeping issues under the rug. It means confronting them in a spirit of humility and grace.
4. Forgetting Justice
God’s command to love our enemies doesn’t negate His promise of justice. Romans 12:19, NKJV reminds us,
“Beloved, do not avenge yourselves, but rather give place to wrath; for it is written, ‘Vengeance is Mine, I will repay,’ says the Lord.”
We can love our enemies precisely because we trust God to deal with them justly. Our role is to obey His command to love; His role is to handle the rest.
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The Power of Loving Your Enemies
Loving your enemies is not just about them; it’s about you and your relationship with God. When you choose to love instead of hate, you align yourself with the heart of God. You become a living testimony of His grace and power.
1. It Frees You
Hatred and unforgiveness are prisons. They chain you to the past and rob you of peace. Loving your enemies breaks those chains. It sets you free to live in the fullness of God’s joy and peace. Why stay shackled to bitterness when Christ has called you to freedom?
2. It Reflects Christ
Jesus loved His enemies to the point of death. While hanging on the cross, He prayed,
“Father, forgive them, for they do not know what they do” (Luke 23:34, NKJV).
When we love our enemies, we follow in His footsteps and bear witness to His transformative power.
3. It Plants Seeds of Change
Love has the power to change hearts. When you respond to hatred with love, you plant seeds that God can use to bring about transformation. You may never see the full impact of your obedience, but rest assured, it is not in vain. Remember, God’s Word never returns void (Isaiah 55:11, NKJV).
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Practical Steps to Start Loving Your Enemies
1. Examine Your Heart
Ask God to reveal any bitterness or unforgiveness in your heart. Psalm 139:23-24, NKJV is a powerful prayer for this:
“Search me, O God, and know my heart; try me, and know my anxieties; and see if there is any wicked way in me, and lead me in the way everlasting.”
2. Commit to Prayer
Start praying for your enemies. Ask God to bless them, guide them, and work in their lives. Be honest about your struggles, but keep praying. If you can’t find the words, let the Holy Spirit intercede (Romans 8:26, NKJV).
3. Take Small Steps
Look for small, tangible ways to show kindness. It could be a kind word, a thoughtful gesture, or even just refraining from speaking negatively about them. Start small; obedience in the little things paves the way for bigger victories.
4. Lean on God’s Strength
Loving your enemies is not something you can do in your own strength. It requires the power of the Holy Spirit. Spend time in prayer and Scripture, asking God to fill you with His love.
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A Higher Calling
Loving your enemies is one of the most challenging commands Jesus gave us, but it’s also one of the most transformative. It forces us to confront our own sin, rely on God’s grace, and reflect His character to a watching world.
It’s not about feeling warm and fuzzy toward those who hurt us. It’s about making a deliberate choice to act in love, even when it’s hard. It’s about trusting God’s justice, seeking the good of others, and allowing His love to flow through us. As you walk this challenging path, remember this: loving your enemies isn’t about weakness; it’s about Kingdom strength. It’s a reflection of the supernatural love that God has poured out on us through Jesus Christ.
So, the next time you encounter someone who opposes you, hurts you, or misunderstands you, ask yourself: “How can I love them in a way that glorifies God?” And then take that step, trusting that your obedience will bear fruit—not just in their lives, but in yours as well. As Romans 12:21, NKJV reminds us,
“Do not be overcome by evil, but overcome evil with good.”
In doing so, you not only fulfill Christ’s command but also become a beacon of His love in a world desperately in need of it. Let’s rise to this higher calling, trusting that God will do the work in us and through us. Amen.
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Originally published Tuesday, 28 January 2025.