Usually, when we hear our partner say that they want to do couples counseling with us, we freak out. Only couples with serious problems go to couples counseling, right? While many couples go to therapy after a traumatic event or infidelity, many couples go to couples counseling to strengthen their relationship. I have a friend who got married a few years ago, and she and her now husband went through dating counseling and premarital counseling, and they are still doing couples counseling now.
While many people might feel overwhelmed with all of these levels of counseling, they are very beneficial. You and your partner do not have to do every single one of these counseling scenarios, but trying out Christian couples counseling might be helpful. Whether you are just dating, engaged, or have been married for many years, there are many benefits to Christian couples counseling. Christian counseling will help you and your partner work through difficult problems as well as know how to communicate with each other better.
Something very common within couples is the struggle to communicate. This is one of the many benefits of Christian couples counseling, as listed below; however, it is also important to note that communication issues can become the tip of the iceberg for many couples. If you are proactive and work on communication issues with a counselor now, it can help prevent the issue from growing into something larger or more complex to address later.
Even if you might think Christian couples counseling is not something you need right now, consider keeping it as a mental note for yourself in the future. If you are not in a relationship right now, it might seem silly to even think about Christian couples counseling, but it might be something you need in the future. There are many benefits to Christian couples counseling, and it will help you and your partner. If you want to keep reading, here are five of those benefits.
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1. Resolving Differences Strengthens Relationships
One benefit of Christian couples counseling is that it strengthens your relationship with your partner. Through Christian couples counseling, you can talk more about issues, relieve any tensions anyone may have, and become a stronger couple because of it. Many falsely believe their friends, parents, or siblings have the perfect marriage. This is not true. Everyone’s marriages have issues.
Everyone has disagreements, problems, and issues. This is something we need to talk about because when you start having issues or problems with your partner, you will think that there is something wrong with you or your marriage. It is normal not to get along about everything and to have disagreements at times. It isn’t normal if nobody can regulate their emotions and there are constant fights.
If there are constant fights in your relationship, you need to have Christian couples counseling. Still, you are also going to have to learn how to communicate with each other appropriately. More often than not, you are fighting over nothing. You could feel less than valuable to your spouse because they need to prioritize you and your relationship. This can make you feel terrible about yourself and cause problems in the relationship.
Through Christian couples counseling, you can work through these issues and get to the core of the problem. You will have a stronger relationship with your partner once you can work through these problems in Christian couples counseling. Even though counseling can bring up many unwanted feelings and uncomfortable conversations, it will help you in the long run. If you and your spouse can learn how to deal with these complex feelings and uncomfortable discussions, your relationship will be stronger.
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2. Counseling Improves Communication Skills
A second benefit of Christian couples counseling is better communication. Communication is crucial for all relationships. Communication is vital whether you are just dating, recently got engaged, or have been married for over a decade. Without healthy communication, your entire relationship will suffer because of it. Your partner is the person you should feel most comfortable around. After all, they are the person that you want to spend the rest of your life with.
Since this is true, it is crucial to have good communication. Sadly, many couples do not have good communication. If you have noticed that your relationship has been struggling somewhat, you and your partner may need to work on better contact with each other. Christian couples counseling will be able to help you work on this, and after many sessions, you and your partner should be doing better with communicating your needs, wants, and plans for the future.
Through working with a Christian couples counselor, they will be able to help both of you improve on your communication with one another. Due to our sinful nature, we often think we are constantly right, and our partner is always wrong. However, it could be we need to be in the right place, and we need to get better at listening to our partners and ensuring they feel heard. If this relates to you, I want you to know that Christian couples counseling can help you resolve this issue.
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3. Counseling Relieves and Resolves Tension
A third benefit of Christian couples counseling is that it helps relieve tension. This is especially true if you and your partner have gone through something hard. It could be your spouse cheated on you, but you both want to repair the relationship. If you are the one who was cheated on, you might have a lot of anger, resentment, and sadness bottled up inside. Attending Christian couples counseling with your spouse will relieve this tension and allow you to express your feelings to your counselor and spouse.
If you are the person who cheated on your spouse, you equally could be struggling with unwanted feelings. Christian couples counseling will also be able to help relieve you of these feelings and tensions as well. Communicating with your spouse will help relieve tensions and bring peace, trust, and unity back into the relationship. Whether you are the one who cheated or was the one who got cheated on, tensions can be released when you both start attending Christian couples counseling together. Counseling can repair your marriage and save it.
Never underestimate how much attending counseling could help your marriage. Sometimes, we believe the false notion that counseling doesn’t do much, but this is not true. Counseling is adequate if we are honest with our counselor, apply what they teach us, and actively try to incorporate their lessons into our everyday lives. Give Christian couples counseling a try and see if it helps your situation. Through Christian couples counseling and including God in your relationship, you can work through any issue.
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4. Counseling is a Conduit to Healing
A fourth benefit of Christian couples counseling is healing. Similar to the last point, Christian couples counseling can help after infidelity. Even if there is no infidelity involved, there might be another reason you need healing in your relationship. Maybe your partner said something extraordinarily hurtful, or your spouse is becoming more distant from you. All these things can cause a lasting hole in our hearts, which is why we need healing.
It could be your spouse is going through something they haven’t shared with you or felt too ashamed to say anything about. It could also be they feel awful about what they said that hurt you, or they are growing distant because of a mental health flare-up. It is essential to look at all of these angles, and through Christian couples counseling, your counselor will be able to help you and your spouse heal. Healing will help your relationship become more sturdy, even if you have struggled with a terrible event.
When healing through couples counseling, it is essential to remember that there is no timeline. There is no end date when you need to be “cured.” Instead, moving forward will take time, energy, and the desire. Holding onto unforgiveness, pain, and resentment will only hurt you in the long run. It is okay to feel these feelings, but it is also essential to be able to heal and move forward.
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5. Christian Counseling is Grounded in Truth
A fifth benefit of Christian couples counseling is that it will provide you with guidance from a trusted Christian counselor. This counselor will use the Word of God as their source, and they will include God in every session. This is why having a Christian counselor rather than a counselor who is not a Christian is beneficial. You need God in your relationship. A non-Christian couples counselor might not respect your beliefs and will not include God or the Bible in your sessions.
Try to find a good Christian counselor by doing some research. If you have any friends who have seen Christian couple counselors before, ask them for the contact information of the clinic or office. In this way, you will be on your way to being connected to a Christian counselor sooner than later. Even if your relationship or marriage is not on the rocks right now, you and your spouse can still benefit from Christian couples counseling. Could you give it a try and see what you and your spouse think? It could be the perfect thing you both need right now.
If you are hesitant, know it is okay to be doubtful first. Maybe you have had a bad encounter with a counselor in the past. If this is true for you, know that not all counselors are bad. Many great counselors are out there, although they can be hard to find. If you are ready to start looking for a counselor, ask the Lord to help lead you to the right one. God is always faithful and will lead you to the right Christian couples counselor.
There are many benefits of Christian couples counseling. A few of these benefits are that it strengthens your relationship, helps you have better communication, helps relieve tension, is beneficial to healing, and you will receive guidance from a trusted Christian counselor.
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Originally published Friday, 02 February 2024.