Not to commit adultery is one of the Ten Commandments, as God told Moses, "You shall not commit adultery" (Exodus 20:14). This is a very important commandment because there is much involved with this commandment.
We know God wouldn't have included it as a commandment to the people unless He saw there was a need to discuss this issue.
Similar to the modern day, adultery was committed in the times of the Old Testament. This is because of sin and unfaithfulness, which ultimately only causes pain.
You Shall Not Commit Adultery
As God tells us in Exodus 20:14, we should not commit adultery. This is given as a command because the relationship between a husband and a wife is a sacred covenant before God.
If one breaks this covenant by committing adultery, there will be horrible pain, problems, and ensuing divorce. When a man and a woman get married, they make a sacred covenant before the Lord.
Often, we hear in their vows their devotion to one another. They are to love each other no matter what — in sickness, in health, in wealth, in poverty. Before God, the man and woman are entering a sacred relationship that should never be broken.
These two individuals are making a lifelong decision to be married to each other, and never should they decide to be unfaithful to one another.
Within marriage, there is deep intimacy that you have with your spouse that you shouldn't have with anyone else. If your spouse is intimate with someone else, they are breaking God's command to not commit adultery.
One might argue we are not under the Ten Commandments today, and they would be right in a sense. While we are not required to obey the Ten Commandments in the sense that we will be saved or seen as righteous, we should obey the Ten Commandments.
The importance of being loyal to your husband or wife is also seen in Paul's teachings to the Ephesians (Ephesians 5). A husband must love his wife with his whole heart and love her as Christ loves the church. In the same way, the wife must love and respect her husband.
Since this is true, where is there room for unfaithfulness? There isn't, and it goes directly against God's design for marriage. If one spouse is unfaithful, they are sinning not just against their spouse, but they are also sinning against God.
God created the beautiful creation of marriage, and it is not something that we should mess around with. Marriage is meant to be between one woman and one man. Within this bond, the husband and wife should devote themselves first to God and then to each other.
Never should there be a third person involved and never is the husband or wife allowed to stray from being faithful to their spouse.
The commandment to not commit adultery was placed upon the people of Israel because adultery is a sin, and God wanted to protect the people from this sin. God knows what sin does and how much pain, misery, and heartbreak it can cause in the hearts of His children.
Adultery can leave a deep wound in the heart of a wife and a husband, and often, this wound may never be healed. While it is true that some wives and husbands might want to try to work out the problem and make their marriage stronger, it doesn't always happen this way.
The Significance of Marriage
When you commit adultery, you are breaking the commitment you made before God to your spouse. You were not faithful to them, and as a result, your spouse may want to divorce you and begin healing.
God didn't just give this commandment for the people of Israel, but rather, this is for all people. There can be no happiness in marriage if adultery and unfaithfulness are involved. Once adultery happens and one spouse is unfaithful to the other, there will be trust issues, anger, and pain.
If you truly love your spouse, try to fight these urges and bring them before God. Many believe that only men get these urges; however, women can equally be found guilty of being unfaithful to their husbands.
Whenever you have strong feelings of wanting to be unfaithful to your spouse, or you start lusting after someone else, bring these problems to God. Ask Him to help you with these sins and ask Him to help renew your heart with love for Him and a love for your spouse.
There can be many reasons why a person may start feeling the urge to be unfaithful; however, you can stop this before it happens. Turn to the Lord and remember the vows you made before God.
Remember your spouse and the love you have for them. Recognize that if you choose to be unfaithful to your spouse, it could result in divorce and a severed relationship.
While there can be healing after unfaithfulness and adultery, it can take time, and your marriage may never be the same. This is why God gave us the commandment to not commit adultery because it only results in sin.
The word sin has been washed down in the present day and can even be seen as "cool" by many who don't know God. Even though this happens in the modern day, we need to recognize sin for what it is — horrible, wicked and causes us to be separated from God.
Therefore, not only will your unfaithfulness cause your relationship with your spouse to be tarnished, but it will also cause your relationship with God to be tarnished.
Once you have committed adultery, you will probably try to hide from God just as Adam and Eve hid from God in the Garden of Eden. You hide because you know what you did was wrong, and you feel ashamed of it.
The shame will lead you to asking God for forgiveness and this will also lead you to asking forgiveness from your spouse. God will always forgive you, yet you cannot be certain that your spouse will forgive you the same as God does.
Your spouse's emotions and feelings are completely valid, and you need to accept the consequences of what your sin has done.
By choosing to remain faithful to your spouse, you are choosing to remain faithful to God. Marriage is a covenant before God, and it is something that should not be broken. If it is broken because of unfaithfulness, much pain, and problems can happen as a result.
Why Does This Matter?
While it has been normalized in the modern day to have a work "husband" or "wife," it is not right. You have one spouse, and that is the spouse you married. There is no room for flings, boyfriends, or girlfriends.
Just as God wanted to keep His people Israel away from adultery for their own well-being, He also wants to keep us away from it for our own well-being too.
It is not "outdated" to remain faithful to your spouse. In fact, this is what God wants us to do and to remain married to our spouse.
However, if our spouse commits adultery or abuses us, we are not obligated to stay in the marriage. God wants us to have marriages that honor Him and point others to come to know Him.
Marriage is supposed to paint a portrait of Christ's relationship with the church. One cannot do this if one spouse is not faithful to the other. God gives us the commandment not to commit adultery because the end will only be in sin, pain, and heartbreak.
For further reading:
Jesus on Adultery: It’s More Controversial Than You Think
Should Christians Still Follow the 10 Commandments Today?
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