According to a 2024 Pew Research study, health-related New Year’s resolutions are the most popular (79%), with finances (61%), personal relationships (57%), hobbies and interests (55%), and career (49%) rounding out the top five. There is nothing wrong with any of these resolutions. Recognizing that there is something lacking in our physical condition, our general well-being or our relationships reminds us that we are incomplete, fragile, and broken.
While these resolutions relate to significant areas of life, they can also mask something deeper—a longing for completion and satisfaction only found in a right relationship with God. That longing for completion and satisfaction, Augustine suggests, encourages us to distinguish between things to be enjoyed and things to be used. Still, we need to pursue “not wrong” resolutions in the right way—which is to say that we pursue them in their proper order. In On Christian Doctrine, Augustine distinguishes between the things that are to be enjoyed and the things that are to be used. He notes, “to enjoy a thing is to rest with satisfaction in it for its own sake,” whereas “to use…is to employ whatever means are at one’s disposal to obtain what one desires.”
So, how does Augustine’s distinction between enjoyment and use inform the way we think about New Year’s resolutions? How might such a distinction help us reorient our understanding of resolutions? In essence, we need to rethink resolutions by rooting them in discipleship. We need to allow them to emerge from our deep enjoyment of God rather than our dissatisfaction with the various aspects of our lives.
When Dissatisfaction Rules
There is nothing wrong with recognizing our own shortcomings. The problem comes when we allow our dissatisfaction with our “current state” to determine the way that we conceptualize our “desired state.” Having worked in the fitness industry before transitioning into ministry, I’ve seen how dissatisfaction can dominate people's lives. What starts as an appropriate interest in health and fitness can become an obsession. People begin to chase an “ideal” look or level of performance that may be impossible to reach without sacrificing g other aspects of their lives. Obsession points to a deeper spiritual problem. When dissatisfaction becomes our rudder, it controls the direction of our lives.
Unfortunately, dissatisfaction is a taskmaster—it doesn’t let up. Once we lose that “last” five pounds, we decide we need to lose five more or that we need broader shoulders or bigger arms. Dissatisfaction doesn’t disappear—it shifts focus. One object of desire is traded for another, leaving us restless and unsatisfied. It can’t be eliminated. There will always be a reminder of dissatisfaction in this life.
But aren’t we supposed to be dissatisfied with our current state? Aren’t we supposed to be waiting for a time when God will eliminate all sorry, pain, and death (Rev 21:4)? Yes, we should be looking forward to standing in God’s presence. Until that time, we are going to experience some level of dissatisfaction. However, we are also supposed to be finding contentment.
While it’s true that we long for a future where God will wipe away all sorrow, pain, and death (Rev 21:4), Paul notes that he has learned to be content regardless of his circumstances (Phil 4:11-13). His satisfaction is not tied to his circumstances but to serving the Lord. His contentment comes as he reshapes his desires and ambitions to align with God’s purposes. As he models Christ’s humiliation (Phil 2:1-11), he finds satisfaction within the difficulties of this life.
Contentment is not about eliminating desire and ambition. It is about reorienting our desires and ambitions by imitating Christ. It is the consequence of recognizing that we are to enjoy the Triune God. In Augustine’s terms, we “rest with satisfaction” in God for God’s sake.
The problem isn’t that we feel dissatisfaction but that we allow that dissatisfaction to direct us away from the Triune God. We buy into the lie that satisfaction is available only when we overcome specific dissatisfactions. If we are having money trouble, we just need a little more money. If we are overweight, we just need to lose a few pounds. If we are lonely, we just need to find a friend. While these may be “good” things as far as they go, when they displace God as the object of our enjoyment, we will find ourselves in a perpetual state of dissatisfaction. Our various dissatisfactions will rule us.
Resituating Resolutions
It might seem natural to create resolutions focused on areas of our lives where we feel dissatisfied, but this approach can actually trap us in a cycle of ongoing dissatisfaction. Resolutions are tools designed to help us make progress in some aspect of our lives. They are intended to help us grow past perceived shortcomings with our health, relationships, careers, or finances. “Progress” and “growth” imply direction—they assume that we know how to move forward. That assumption, however, can be part of the problem.
Even resolutions that don’t seem to have a downside (e.g., decreasing your amount of alcohol consumption, quitting that smoking habit, getting more exercise, etc.) can become problematic if they become (poor) substitutes for a life rooted in God’s presence. Even “good things” can distract us from pursuing God.
As such, our resolutions need to be “nested” in worship. “Nesting” is a concept developed by James Gibson. Essentially, nesting conveys the idea that smaller “units” are embedded in larger “units.” It isn’t a matter of priority (i.e., more important things and less important things) but about contextualization. Think of nesting like a set of Russian dolls: smaller pieces fitting into larger ones. Our smaller goals—health, finances, relationships—must fit into the larger framework of glorifying God. This isn’t about prioritizing God above all else but about contextualizing all of life with God as our reference point.
What Does it Mean to Say Our Resolutions Need to Be Nested in Worship?
First, it means that we acknowledge that worshipping the Triune God is what we are always supposed to be doing. Worship certainly involves activity, but we may also understand it as a way of life. As I note in Serpents and Doves, “Worship is a way of being in the world that is informed by revelation and refined by discipleship. Through discipleship, we learn to worship the God under whose authority we continually and increasingly commit to live.” Worship is what all those who have been united in Christ by faith are seeking to do. We are always to be pointing to and glorifying the Triune God.
Second, saying that our resolutions are to be nested in worship acknowledges that the best way to point to and glorify God is to set aside our own desires and to pursue the desires of Christ. We are to live according to the pattern of Christ’s life. That pattern involved a willingness to sacrifice for others in obedience to the will of the Father. To do so, we strive to redefine and/or refine desires forged by the world so that they reflect the desires of Christ. When we allow something other than Christ to shape our desires, we lose sight of Christian discipleship—we imitate distorted patterns rather than those revealed in the life of Christ. By nesting our resolutions in discipleship, we show ourselves unwilling to be shaped by something other than Christ.
Finally, nesting our resolutions in worship opens us up to possibilities that exceed our own imaginations. Discipleship expands our vision so that we can more easily recognize the purposes of God. We should not think that we know what is best for our own lives. We may well understand how to change our lives—how to reform our behavior—but we don’t understand all God is trying to do. Would it be “good” to be more physically active, more responsible with our finances, or less anxious and lonely? Of course. Yet we need to recognize that these “goods” pale in comparison to all that God might do as we learn to live under the authority of Christ (Matt 28:20). Apart from discipleship, these “goods” may narrow our vision so that fitness or relationships or money or career become the “biggest unit” into which our lives are immersed. By contrast, discipleship immerses us in God’s presence.
Resolving to Be and Make Disciples
There are some experiences that we can’t fully understand without experiencing them. For instance, I only thought I knew what marriage would be like until I got married. I only thought I knew what being a father was like until I became a father. Being a disciple is an experience that no one can fully explain because living in God’s presence and according to his wisdom and instruction is something we need to experience.
We have no idea how committing to discipleship will transform our lives—though we know that it will. It will cultivate within us peace, joy, and contentment unavailable by any other means. Our resolutions need to emerge from discipleship because when they don’t, they orient us back toward the world instead of pushing us ever closer to the presence of God.
As we approach the New Year, we often think of resolutions as tools to address dissatisfaction. When we nest our resolutions in worship learned through discipleship, they become more than resolutions—they become expressions of our desire to glorify God and to experience his presence in our lives. As you think about the New Year, think first about discipleship. Consider that learning to live under Christ’s authority and to sustain a lifestyle of worship would transform the way you see God, yourself, others, and the world. Consider that resolving to learn to deny the world and follow Christ will open you up to opportunities to honor God beyond anything you could ever ask or think.
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