Mourning is unfortunately a feeling we will all have to face at one time or another. Mourning is the expression of sorrow following a death. However, we know from psychology that grief can rear its head in our lives because of many things aside from death.
Life circumstances like serious moments when the loss of a limb is required for an amputee patient, or in everyday cases like the loss of jobs or the redirection of our lives from the plans that we had created for ourselves.
But in this verse that we are looking at today, I feel the labors of the mourning or grief felt due to a death. All over the world cultures and people groups mourn in such different ways, in the West, we are very sanitized to grief and death in comparison to other people groups.
Ways of Mourning
We will often be found wearing black clothing as a sign of respect, though often today people will ask others to come to their funeral in bright clothing.
This idea of wearing black actually dates back to Roman times when mourners would wear dark clothing to show they were mourning. It was an outward sign of an inward feeling.
In the Jewish culture, they have stages of mourning, first the Shiva, which is the first seven days after a burial.
Then the Avelut, which lasts a whole year and usually after the loss of a parent, and during this time they will say the Kaddish every day, then Yahrzeit, which is the anniversary of a death.
However, in China, mourning lasts for 100 days, which is believed to be the time for the bereaved to be reborn. Lots of cultures have different ways of honoring or respecting their dead, and in response, there is not just one humanity mourns.
However, as Christians, we may find ourselves asking the question where is God in our mourning?
I think in the Western Culture, we have the biased mindset that life should be good and that we should not face trial or testing. At least no one would want to say that about themselves out loud. I am aware that’s a gross generalization, it is not true of us all.
But when trials come or death, we often hear people ask questions like, “Where is Jesus in all of this?” It is hard for our minds to comprehend how God can be present even in despair because we have an idea of what we think a good God should be, and yet He is.
Unfortunately, at only 36 years of age, I have had to deal with grief and its complexities more times than I would like. But when I look back, I can see that God was beautifully present and comforting in that grief.
Let's look at the first book of the New Testament and read Matthew chapter 5 verse 4, which states: “Blessed are those who mourn, for they will be comforted.”
These words are a collection of statements that all begin with “Blessed Are” and were spoken by Jesus, often now named the Sermon on the Mount.
Jesus had just called his disciples and healed the sick in Galilee when large crowds from neighboring towns and villages followed him. When Jesus saw these crowds, he went up to the mountainside, and as in Jewish teaching, he sat down to teach them.
He begins with the Beatitudes. These statements sum up, in a few sentences what it is like to be a child of God.
They address the poor, the meek, the hungry, the merciful, the pure in heart, the peacemakers, the persecuted, and of course those who mourn. We will likely all find ourselves in one of these spaces at one time or another.
But when we are in mourning where is Jesus? He declares loudly from a mountainside that we are blessed when we mourn for His comfort will be made known to us. But how?
Often, we get caught in the trap of thinking God has more important things to do with His time than be present with us. But I always find myself drawn to Abraham and Hagar when I think that.
God has made a promise to Abraham that he and Sarah would have a son. Sarah offers her husband Hagar, and they conceive and in the end, Sarah hates Hagar.
Hagar is sent away and in the process of God talking to Abraham about the promised son yet to be, God also sees Hagar a woman on the run with her young son.
It is here we hear God called El Roi, the God who sees me! Friend, no matter the season, or the trials others face, God sees You!
God Comforts Us in Our Mourning
The Bible tells us in lots of verses that God knows all about us, from the beginning of our lives (Jeremiah 1) to the hair on our heads (Matthew 10).
He knows our hearts (Jeremiah 17) and our thoughts (Psalm 139). He even knows our worries and the scriptures tell us in 1 Peter 5:7 that we are to “cast all of our cares upon the Lord for he cares for you.”
A God who cares for us so intricately and intimately would never leave us floundering on our own suffering in grief, even when our feelings tell us otherwise.
Thankfully we have Scripture to declare in those seasons and we can say the words of Deuteronomy 31:8 which says: “I will never leave you nor forsake you!” This is a promise we can hold onto and grasp tightly when the storms of life, or the darkness of grief take hold of us.
Psalm 23 puts it beautifully by saying, “Though I walk through the valley of the shadow of death you are with me, your rod and your staff guide me.” For a shepherd, these items were used to guide the sheep.
The staff is used only for the sheep and is used in guidance, but the rod conveys authority and power. Our good shepherd as John 10 puts it, uses a rod and a staff in those dark crevices of grief to guide us through, and in authority He has been given by the Father.
God does not want to hurry us out of dark seasons so that we are comfortable, but he wants us to experience all of the emotions our body needs to go through, acknowledging all that life is, but knowing He will be with us.
Usually, we would see the word “Blessed” as happy, but in this instance, I think Jesus is trying to tell us that we do not need to be happy in our grief and run around laughing and faking our emotions in denial.
But that we can experience it fully and embrace that season because there is yet hope to come. Hope is not lost in those seasons, but hope is found in Jesus and He is always present and available to us no matter what season we find ourselves in.
Isaiah 53 tells us that Jesus was a man who was acquainted with grief, he does not come to our aid as a far off God telling us what to do but as one who has suffered as we have and yet has not sinned. He understands where you are at in your mourning because he mourned also.
Let me leave you with just two more verses. Psalm 147 tells us that “He heals the brokenhearted and binds up their wounds.”
I would love to tell you that I know how Jesus does that, but I don’t. I know His Word to be true and Him to be faithful.
So, if you are mourning today welcome God in and let him pour in from heaven grace, a healing balm, and a healing life so that you can see this season through in his grace and strength.
No More Death or Crying
Lastly, as I previously said, hope is yet to come. One day Revelation 21 will be in its fulfillment and you will know those glorious words in truth and sight:
God will wipe away every tear from their eyes, there shall be no more death, nor sorrow, or crying. There shall be no more pain, for the former things have passed away.
Friend, our faith will one day be sight and we shall no longer feel the aches and pains of this life, the tears and grief will be gone, and we will see Jesus and be like Him.
Hold on friend, Jesus is coming back for you, and He will take you to be where He is, pain-free, and sorrow-free!
For further reading:
How Do We Mourn with Those Who Mourn?
How Are Those Who Mourn Blessed?
What Does the Beatitude 'Blessed Are Those Who Mourn' Mean?
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