Genesis 4:9 reads, "Then the Lord said to Cain, 'Where is your brother Abel?' 'I don’t know,' he replied. 'Am I my brother’s keeper?'" From this passage, we see God talking with Cain. Cain had recently murdered his brother, and God was asking Cain what had happened to Abel.
Instead of being honest and telling God what happened, Cain gave a response that was cynical and unsympathetic. Through this passage of Scripture and surrounding text, we can understand remorse and why it is important.
As shown in Cain's conversation with God, Cain has no remorse for murdering his brother. Cain and Abel were both supposed to offer a sacrifice for God. God accepted Abel's sacrifice and rejected Cain's sacrifice.
This made Cain angry, jealous, and hateful of his brother. Instead of bringing the matter before God, he took matters into his own hands.
God had warned Cain that evil would be knocking on his door, yet Cain ignored God's warning. He chose to murder his brother Abel and proceeded to show no remorse for killing his brother. God was upset with Cain, yet God did not kill him.
Instead, He marked Cain, cursed him, and sent Him out of the land. Through the mark, Cain would be protected. Since Cain had killed his brother, all people would know he was a murderer, yet because of the mark God gave him, and he was kept protected.
Even with all of the kindness God showed him, Cain never showed remorse for killing his brother. Despite Cain not showing remorse for killing his brother, we all need to know how to be remorseful and the importance of it.
By being remorseful, we are going to be able to see our sinful ways and know how to make them right. Remorse will lead us to conviction and turn us to seek God in forgiveness. If we continue being not remorseful, we will only continue to hurt others, ourselves, and God.
Remorse is important because it shows marked maturity on the behalf of the believer. If one is prideful and never accepts the trouble they inflicted on others, remorse will never be realized.
It is only when one accepts the pain they have inflicted on others that they can act in a true way of being remorseful. Remorse will cause us to turn away from making the same mistake again and turn us back to living in obedience to God.
As Genesis 4:9 shows us, Cain was not remorseful in his actions. He never apologized or told God he knew what he did was wrong. We don't need to make the same mistake as Cain did.
Not many of us like Cain in the Bible, yet many of us can relate to his jealousy, anger, and hatred. Rather than being happy for his brother, he was angry and felt slighted. We can prevent ourselves from becoming like Cain by turning to God and having an honest conversation with Him.
When you are feeling hatred, envy, and jealousy rising in your heart, turn to God. Ask Him to help you with these emotions and to turn your heart back to Him. God will help you with these feelings and guide you in the steps you need to take.
We don't have to follow the example of Cain and end up sinning. While not all envy and hate end in murder, we can do other things that can be equally harmful, hurtful, and painful. We need to choose to reflect on our sins and allow ourselves to have remorse over our actions.
Nobody is perfect, and none of us make perfect decisions all the time. Only God is perfect, and only He makes perfect decisions. When we mess up, we don't need to beat ourselves up about it. Instead, we need to open our hearts to be vulnerable and allow ourselves to be remorseful.
Through remorse, we are going to be able to see our sin as God sees it. Remorse doesn't allow us to be halfway in and halfway out; rather, it causes us to fully commit ourselves to God's hand and tell Him how sorry we are for our actions.
When we are overcome with the severity of our sin and the pain we can cause through our actions, we can become better people for it. We won't be as prone to turn back to our old sins. Instead, we will turn to God.
The next time you just committed a sin, don't allow self-pride or self-righteousness to overtake you. Allow the Holy Spirit to convict you and show you what you have done is wrong. By turning to God, confessing your sin, and turning away from it, God will forgive you.
However, we need to remember that our sin still has consequences even if we turn to God for forgiveness and He forgives us.
God will forgive us, yet it doesn't mean the person we hurt will forgive us. Oftentimes, this in and of itself can cause us to be remorseful.
We don't need to view remorse as a negative thing because it isn't. It is actually a beautiful thing that will allow us to grow and mature. Remorse will help us say no to the things that are bad for us and others. It will help us to turn to do the things that bring God glory.
Remorse is something that we all have inside of us as believers. As children, it can be hard to have remorse since a child's brain is normally only focused on itself.
However, as adults, we are capable of having remorse and knowing how to turn to God for forgiveness. If we choose to deny God and instead choose to live without remorse, the Holy Spirit will slowly give us over to our corrupted flesh.
The Holy Spirit will convict us to a point, yet if we continue to ignore Him, He will give us over to our flesh, and this will result in us having a depraved mind.
God doesn't want us to ignore His Spirit. He wants us to recognize our sin as it is and to turn away from it. Remorse will be something we will experience throughout our lives because we will all sin at times.
It is impossible to say that we will never have to be remorseful because it isn't true. You probably have already had many periods of remorse, just as I have had in my own personal life.
If we self-reflect on our lives, we can see how these times of remorse caused us to become more emphatic, sympathetic, and forgiving individuals. This is important as believers because God wants us to grow to be more like His Son each day.
Remorse will help us to grow and become more understanding believers. We have the choice of whether or not we will follow the way of Cain. By accepting remorse and embracing it, we can avoid the way of Cain and follow the way of Christ.
It can be hard at times to see the error of our actions, yet God will make these times clear to us and help us make the right decisions. We all make mistakes, yet it is up to us what we are going to do with the mistakes and how we are going to avoid them in the future.
For further reading:
'Am I My Brother's Keeper?' True Meaning of Genesis 4:9
How Can We Embrace a Contrite Heart and Spirit
Is There a Prayer for Repentance?
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