Why do bad things happen to good people?
When my mother was diagnosed with a very aggressive form of cancer before the age of 50, I never once heard her ask “Why me?”, even though I constantly asked, “Why her?”. I never heard her get angry with God for the situation and disease she had been dealt, and instead, I witnessed her lean in on her faith and her trust in the Lord and His plan. When I sat with a shattered hope for the future and a challenged trust in God, my mother sat using this unimaginable trial for a unique opportunity at spiritual growth and trust.
Through treatments and bouts of remission, she didn’t use her hardship as an excuse or as a means to lessen her faith and her belief in good. She used it to refine and strengthen it, even while I was silently wondering how God could be so unjust and unfair. How can a plan that leads to eternity so early, so soon, be part of a plan of goodness and of love? My mother was the most caring, helpful, and faithful woman I’d ever known. My mind couldn’t comprehend how this bad thing, this life-threatening diagnosis, had been given to her– a good person, a faithful person, a person who made the world a better place.
For years I threw up a desperate question and prayer to God, “Why, Lord, do bad things happen to good people? Why her, a woman so faithful to your ways– a woman so trusting of your work and your promises? Why, Lord? Why?” For years, I felt ignored, never receiving an answer. I kept asking anyway.
Eventually, years after her cancer diagnosis, my mother would die from the disease. She was only 57. Not once in her struggle and her journey toward healing did I witness her questioning God’s justice or his fairness. Not once did I witness her in fear for her future. Not once did I watch her hope dissipate or her strength fade, even though all of those things were happening in me. She was the one that had endured the impossible, yet through it all, she was the one that held it all together– faith, hope, love, trust.
I realized after she passed that I wanted to be like her. I wanted to have a trust without borders and without invisible walls built by lack of understanding. I didn’t want a blind faith, I wanted an unshakeable one. When I felt like God wasn’t answering my questions and prayers quickly enough or in ways that I could interpret as meant for me, I searched for answers in His word.
I asked, “Why do bad things happen to good people?” and this is what I found:
7 Comforting Truths to Remember When Bad Things Happen to Good People
1. No one is exempt from hardship, for we live in a sinful and fallen world.
We might be good, but we are not perfect. In a world where sin and evil are present, we are susceptible to the consequences of those two things.
“For all have sinned and fall short of the glory of God.” - Romans 3:23
2. Life is not fair and it has limits.
We should focus on the eternal perspective, knowing all people share the same fate because death is inevitable. Remembering, judgment comes after death, the ultimate factor in deciding who lived as God’s faithful and trusting servants.
"All share a common destiny—the righteous and the wicked, the good and the bad, the clean and the unclean, those who offer sacrifices and those who do not.” - Ecclesiastes 9:2
3. There is mystery in God’s ways and we should trust Him in everything, even in suffering.
Even when we do not understand, we must believe and hold fast in His goodness and His sovereignty. The truth is that life holds immense suffering and there is no clear “why” on this side of eternity. The entire book of Job shows how God allowed Satan to test Job. Job questioned God’s justice and fairness, and yet, still with no explanation, Job maintained his faith. Job’s circumstances highlight the importance of trusting God, even when suffering is impossible to understand.
4. Hardship, while not desired or wished for, can lead to positive outcomes.
Hardship can lead to stronger character and maturity. It can lead to greater endurance and hope than we’ve ever held or believed possible. God’s trials, though not understood, can refine our faith and develop spiritual growth, if we allow them to by having a heart open to those transitions.
“Not only so, but we also glory in our sufferings, because we know that suffering produces perseverance; perseverance, character; and character, hope. And hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured out into our hearts through the Holy Spirit, who has been given to us.” - Romans 5: 3-5
5. Negative events can be used for good.
For all of those that love Him, God is actively involved in each aspect of our lives. God’s work is not random. It is planned and purposeful, even when we do not understand. No matter what happens in life, we should trust Him- always. It is not an easy accomplishment, but a noble and worthy one.
"And we know that in all things God works for the good of those who love him, who have been called according to his purpose." - Romans 8:28
6. God is in control, even when His purpose isn’t always clear to us.
He doesn’t promise no hardship, He promises that our hardships will be used for good. Remembering, good doesn’t mean immediate, but rather in His timing.
"The Lord works out everything to its proper end— even the wicked for a day of disaster." - Proverbs 16:4
7. There is a time for everything.
There is a time for everything and I’m glad that today, there is a time for trust– trusting that God is in control, and there is no one else I trust more with that power.
“Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding. In all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” - Proverbs 3: 5-6
The common theme I found again and again throughout the bible is that both good and bad things happen to everyone. No one is exempt from hardship or times of struggle. The glory is found in the hope-filled truth that God ultimately uses the “bad” for lasting good. In life there is no definitive distinction between good and bad. Judgement comes at death. It comes after life is lived, which is why we must look beyond the now and strive for an ending in heaven– trusting God’s path for each one of us, even when it’s hard to accept or understand. Suffering is a natural part of life, even though we wish this weren’t true. While we look around the world and try to define good and bad, holy and evil, there is no personal merit system that we are privy to, nor in charge of. On this side of heaven, there are positives and negatives that occur in each one of our lives and our journeys, and there will always be according to His plan.
In both life and death, my mother taught me the invaluable lesson to trust God through it all. She taught me a faith that might be challenged but one that would never falter. She taught me to live righteously and trust God’s plan through it all– even suffering and even in the midst of a profound and heartbreaking loss. My mother did not fear her path because she knew where it would lead. She was able to trust and see beyond the present life, into an infinite one with the Lord.
Now, each day, I wake up in a pursuit to be more like her- to trust wholeheartedly, even when it hurts and especially when things don’t make sense. I will not understand all of the “why’s” that my heart holds because I am not meant to, and that’s not easy, but it’s okay.
Photo Credit: ©GettyImages/ Blasius Erlinger
