A young woman became pregnant. A college student without a job, she saw no other alternative and had an abortion. While this story may seem all too familiar to many, this story is personal to me because it happened to a good friend of mine. Women in this situation may look for help from organizations like Planned Parenthood, or they may consider a crisis pregnancy center. I know for some of you reading this, just the mention of the words Planned Parenthood makes your hair stand up on edge. However, this article is not really about them but more about our mission as the church to help women in these situations. Women facing crisis pregnancies need help, and the question becomes should the church do more to help crisis pregnancy centers and single parents?
What are crisis pregnancy centers?
How you define a crisis pregnancy center depends on who you ask. Here is how Heartbeat International describes a crisis pregnancy center, also known as a pregnancy help center.
“Pregnancy Help Centers (PHCs) are life-affirming non-profit service providers that provide women who have an unexpected pregnancy with alternatives to abortion. Their services often include free pregnancy tests, consultation, ultrasounds, material support; education and information on adoption and abortion; and services and referrals for ongoing pregnancy and parenting needs.”
Opponents of crisis pregnancy centers, however, paint them in a different light. Here is a description of crisis pregnancy centers from the blog of one of their leading opponents Planned Parenthood.
“Crisis pregnancy centers (also called CPCs or “fake clinics”) are clinics or mobile vans that look like real health centers, but they’re run by anti-abortion activists who have a shady, harmful agenda: to scare, shame, or pressure you out of getting an abortion, and to tell lies about abortion, birth control, and sexual health. Crisis pregnancy centers don’t provide abortion or offer a full range of health care, and they won’t give you honest facts about sexual health and your pregnancy options — their goal is to spread misinformation and propaganda.”
As you can see, these two descriptions are on opposite ends of the spectrum.
The sanctity of life urges the church to provide help.
There is one major reason the church should do more to help crisis pregnancy centers. That reason is they are about life. We refer to it as a crisis pregnancy for a simple reason. Typically, the woman who is pregnant is in some form of crisis, facing an unwanted or unexpected pregnancy. Crisis pregnancy centers attempt to provide solutions for women other than having an abortion. These include having the baby and possibly adoption. Many of the crisis pregnancy centers are faith-based and have doctrinal positions of life most churches align with. I must say most because I cannot make a blanket statement that Christians and churches agree with the pro-life position.
Most crisis pregnancy centers are clear in their positions on abortion and promote sexual integrity and sexual purity within a marital relationship. They are often supporters of abstinence, and these are things the church should support because it aligns with Scripture.
However, every Christian or every church will not agree with their views regarding birth control. Churches and Christians have different opinions on using birth control and the types you should use. If a church is going to support a crisis pregnancy center, they need to make sure they are in alignment with that center’s position on birth control. Even if they are, there may be members in their congregation who disagree.
An expected mother’s perspective reminds us to be merciful.
There is another side to this question that shifts the focus from the pregnancy center to the pregnant mother. For a moment, we need to take into consideration the feelings of a woman facing an unexpected or unwanted pregnancy. Some women in this position worry about their future and how they will provide for their child. This is a viable concern, considering recent studies show it costs over $300,000 to raise a child from birth to age 18. While diapers, onesies, and formula are nice to receive in the beginning, that is just the tip of the iceberg. It is going to take a lot more than to raise a child. Beyond that, there may be fears of the type of relationship they will have with the child’s father or how this will affect their education, job, and career options in the future. Some may also fear the lack of emotional support or worry about the type of parent they will be. These were the same fears my friend experienced, which led her to have an abortion.
Too often, this conversation focuses on the life of the baby or the life of the mother. If we are going to have a healthy conversation about the church supporting crisis pregnancy centers and single parents, we need to talk about the lives of both. While pro-abortion organizations use the fears mentioned earlier to move women toward abortion, as the church, we cannot pretend these fears don’t exist and deny their reality.
We need support for the whole life.
The support of the church should go to crisis pregnancy centers that don’t just support life in the womb but who truly support the life of the parent once the baby comes out of the womb. As any parent will tell you, this is where the actual work begins. The responsibility of raising a child is challenging enough when both parents are involved. This challenge grows exponentially if you are a single parent.
If we are going to be the church, then we must make sure there are resources in place to support single parents. Not just when the babies are small, cute, and cuddly but throughout the entirety of raising that child. Being a single parent doesn’t get easier as the child gets older, it often gets more demanding. If there are organizations that exist to aid in supporting single parents through the lifespan of raising a child, then the church should support them.
The church is called to help those in need.
In Luke 14, here is what Jesus said.
“Suppose one of you wants to build a tower. Won’t you first sit down and estimate the cost to see if you have enough money to complete it?” - Luke 14:28
Single parents will need financial resources. People from low-income communities don’t have the advantage of the deep pockets of family members to help support their children as they grow up. This leaves them to look for government and community help. Single parents often struggle to find resources that will allow them to work. For example, affordable childcare, babysitting services, and before and after-school programs. Support does not always mean giving handouts. Sometimes it means providing a way for single parents to work so they can provide their own financial resources. This points back to counting the cost and caring for the whole life of the child and the mother. In researching some websites of the more well-known crisis pregnancy organizations, I didn’t see a lot of information regarding these things. I am not saying they don’t do it. I just didn’t find it.
While crisis pregnancy centers encourage mothers to have their babies, we need to make sure there is support to help them afterward. Some people love to picket to support the life of the unborn. While there is nothing wrong with that, we need more people pitching in with both hands to support the lives of those who have been born, especially if they are single parents and even more so if we are the ones encouraging them to have the child.
One quick note on the adoption option. People use that as a choice and make it seem so easy. Yet women who give up their children for adoption face many emotional challenges, including doubt, guilt, depression, denial, and regret. They may eventually come to accept their decision, but they are going to need a lot of emotional support along the way. Again, this is where the church can do more to support single mothers.
Final thought.
I know for many, this seems like a simple cut-and-dry topic. Don’t abort, just have the baby. While I agree every child has a right to life, this must be more than a political talking point. If the church is going to do this justice, we need to make sure we are supporting life from birth to death and everywhere in between. It is easy to say keep the child. It is a lot harder to birth a child and raise the child. If we are going to tell the mother to keep her child, then let’s make sure we are truly supporting single parents who are taking the responsibility to do it not just with our words but with our actions.
“Dear children, let us not love with words or speech but with actions and in truth.” - 1 John 3:18
Photo credit: ©Getty Images/Stevan Ovicigor
