What do you do when your worst nightmare becomes reality? A couple of years ago, Lisa and I faced the unimaginable: we lost our precious daughter, LeeBeth. The pain was more profound than words can capture. Yet, in the heart of that anguish, God met us with grace and purpose. If you’re navigating heartache, grief, or disappointment, know this: you can bring it all to God. You can “altar” it.
LeeBeth’s Story: A Life Full of Love and Struggles
LeeBeth was an incredible young woman. From the time she was a little girl, she was right there with us as we planted and built Fellowship Church. I had the privilege of baptizing her just outside our church. She was creative, compassionate, and full of life. She had a unique combination of artistic brilliance and sharp leadership—a rare blend that allowed her to connect deeply with people while also guiding them.
But like many, she carried burdens beneath the surface. LeeBeth struggled with anxiety and bouts of depression, and after a few difficult relationships, she began to binge drink. She wasn’t the type of person anyone would label a “party girl,” but she fell into a cycle of using alcohol to numb her pain. We talk about this more in our book, but what I want to emphasize here is that she was so much more than her struggles. LeeBeth’s heart was beautiful. She longed to be whole and to be used by God in big ways.
Understanding Pain: The Great Equalizer
We live in a world saturated with pain. Whether it’s the loss of a loved one, a devastating breakup, financial ruin, or a struggle with anxiety and addiction, pain doesn’t discriminate. In fact, pain is the great equalizer. But what sets us apart as believers is not the absence of pain—it’s how we respond to it.
Proverbs 3:5–6 tells us, “Trust in the Lord with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight.” This passage has become an anchor for our family. It reminds us that even when life doesn’t make sense, God’s path through pain leads to healing and hope.
The “What” of Pain: Trust
When LeeBeth passed away, I remember asking, “God, what do I do now?” The first answer was trust. Trust in the Lord with all your heart.
To trust God fully means relinquishing control. When you surrender your pain to Him, you’re not admitting defeat—you’re stepping into His care. Trusting Him doesn’t mean you have to understand the why. It simply means believing that His love is greater than the storm.
The “Why” of Pain: Purpose
We often ask, “Why is this happening?” Sometimes, the pain we face is a result of others’ choices or our own. Ultimately, though, pain exists because we live in a broken world. Romans 8:22 describes all creation as groaning in pain, like a woman in labor. This brokenness affects everything.
Even when you can’t see the full picture, God’s purpose is unfolding. Instead of getting stuck in the “what ifs” and regrets, acknowledge that Jesus is extending His nail-scarred hand to pull you out of the pool of despair. He has a purpose for your life—one that can use your pain for His glory.
The “When” of Pain: Now
Proverbs 3:6 urges us to acknowledge God in all our ways. When? Now. The moment you feel overwhelmed, that’s the time to turn to God. Don’t wait until you have all the answers or feel strong enough. God meets you right where you are, in your brokenness.
We had every reason to stay in the pit of sorrow. But God gently reminded us that His timing and presence are immediate. Healing begins when you invite Him into the moment.
The “Where” of Pain: A Path Forward
The Bible promises that when we trust and acknowledge God, He will make our paths straight. This doesn’t mean life becomes easy, but it does mean that God is carving a way through the wilderness. Imagine Him as a guide with a machete, clearing the brush and smoothing the path.
Psalm 37:23–24 says, “The steps of a man are established by the Lord... when he falls, he will not be hurled headlong, because the Lord is the One who holds his hand.” God isn’t just watching from a distance—He’s holding your hand, leading you through the chaos.
Altar it, Don’t Alter it
In Romans 12:1, Paul writes, “Offer your bodies as a living sacrifice...” This verse reminds us that we’re called to place our pain, plans, and dreams on God’s altar.
Here’s where I want to be clear: we’re not called to alter God’s plan (changing it to fit our preferences). Instead, we’re called to altar it—to lay it down before Him. That’s what Lisa and I have chosen to do every day. We place our grief on God’s altar, trusting that He will bring beauty from ashes.
I was writing a message on Abraham and Isaac when I felt the weight of our loss. I had just written, “Where’s the lamb? The Lord will provide.” Living that truth meant trusting that the same God who provided for Abraham was with us.
Purpose in the Pain
You may wonder, “What’s the point of this suffering?” While we don’t always understand the details, we know that God uses pain to refine us and to draw us closer to Him.
Take Solomon, for example. The wealthiest and wisest man who ever lived wrote Proverbs 3:5–6 to his son, urging him to trust God. Yet later, Solomon strayed, accumulating wealth, wives, and distractions that pulled him off course.
In Ecclesiastes, he reflects on the futility of chasing earthly pleasures and concludes, “Remember your Creator in the days of your youth” (12:1). Solomon’s story is a sobering reminder that even the most blessed among us can lose sight of God’s path.
Light for the Path
Psalm 119:105 says, “Your word is a lamp for my feet and a light on my path.” When life feels dark, God’s Word becomes our guide. I remember a childhood walk with my father to a lake at sunset. He handed me a flashlight and told me to light the way. When we encountered water moccasins on the path, fear gripped me. But my dad took my hand and steadied me.
In the same way, our heavenly Father holds us when we’re terrified, guiding us through the dangers of life. His Word illuminates each step, giving us direction when we can’t see the way ahead.
What’s on Your Altar?
Is there a burden you’ve been trying to carry alone? Maybe it’s the pain of loneliness, addiction, or uncertainty. God is inviting you to place it on His altar.
Chris Tomlin’s song How Great Is Our God will always hold deep meaning for our family. It’s a reminder that even in our darkest moments, God’s greatness surrounds us. And His greatness isn’t just for special moments—it’s for every step of the path through pain.
Take the Next Step
If you’re ready to experience God’s healing and peace, we invite you to “altar” your life to Him. Trust in His purpose, even when you can’t see the outcome.
To help you take that next step, we’d love to offer you the first chapter of Pastor Ed’s book A Path Through Pain for free. This chapter offers practical guidance and hope for anyone walking through difficult seasons.
Sign up today and begin your journey toward healing and wholeness. No matter how deep your pain, God’s path leads to peace. Place it on the altar and watch how He transforms your story.
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/Ryan McVay
Through Ed Young Ministries, Ed extends his passion for helping people grow in their faith by providing inspirational content, online sermons, and practical resources for Christian living. With a heart for equipping church leaders, Ed launched C3 Global, CreativePastors.com, and the Creative Church Conference (C3)—initiatives that offer coaching, teaching, and resources to thousands of pastors and ministry leaders. He is also a prolific author, addressing topics such as leadership, marriage, and Christian living. His New York Times bestselling book, Sexperiment: 7 Days to Lasting Intimacy with Your Spouse, challenges couples to strengthen their relationships through biblical principles. Other popular titles include The Marriage Mirror, The Creative Leader, and Outrageous, Contagious Joy.
For powerful messages, life-changing resources, and ways to grow in your faith, visit Ed Young Ministries.
