I recently took my teenage son to get a haircut at my “fancy” hair salon. He’s in that teenage stage where he wants a “cool” haircut; he no longer wants his dad to buzz his hair in the garage.
When we walked in, my stylist took one look at me, and said, “Girl. Are you stressed?”
“Why?” I asked, a little shocked.
“You have stress hair!”
“What is stress hair? What are you even talking about?” I responded, appalled.
At that moment, my stylist said something I never expected to hear: “Your hair is telling a story. You need nourishment. You need rest. And we need to cut it.... today.”
I left the salon, with not only my son’s new look, but also with an unexpected haircut for myself...and a whole lot of big feelings.
You need rest.
You need nourishment.
Your hair is telling a whole story.
These phrases kept running through my head weeks after that appointment because I knew my hair was telling me something I had been ignoring.
When Life Feels Too Stressful
The truth is, I have been stressed out lately — life’s demands on a mom of three teenagers, work changes, and some financial difficulties, plus a deep season of grief after losing my best friend to breast cancer. Well, I didn’t realize the toll it was taking on my body. But my hair was telling the story.
So — what to do when we need soul nourishment? When we need rest? When we need to replenish?
The hard part is that when we need soul rest, the last thing we should do is more.
We don’t need more hustle or more things to check off our to-do lists. Rather, we need to remember that we are human beings, not human doings.
So, we start by getting curious. We check in with our emotions. We find out and name what is causing so much stress.
And then? We go about the business of tending to our soul’s feeding.
But how? Below are a few simple ideas:
1. Be in the Word
God’s word is rest for the weary soul. The law of the Lord is perfect, refreshing the soul. (Psalm 19:7a NIV).
2. Listen to Worship Music
God is big, and we are not. Worship helps us to trust him and not strive in our stress.
Let the message of Christ dwell among you richly as you teach and admonish one another with all wisdom through psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit, singing to God with gratitude in your hearts (Colossians 3:16).
3. Rest
Literally go to sleep. Take baths. Drink relaxing tea. Wind down. Pause from the often — violent rhythms of life. Be kind to yourself.
For anyone who enters God's rest also rests from their works, just as God did from his. Let us, therefore, make every effort to enter that rest, so that no one will perish by following their example of disobedience (Hebrews 9:9-11).
4. Play
Sabbath rest is also Sabbath delight. Enjoy times of fun with family and with your friends. Play games.
Go on walks. Enjoy life! This is an act of worship, a biblical commandment and does wonders for your soul’s replenishment.
Six days you shall labor and do all your work, but the seventh day is a sabbath to the Lord your God. On it you shall not do any work, neither you, nor your son or daughter, nor your male or female servant, nor your animals, nor any foreigner residing in your towns (Exodus 20:8-11).
5. Remember the Basics
Just like my hair needed some new vitamins, our souls need sunshine, movement, water, and good food — the basics — to feel refreshed and be nourished. In fact, in Maslows’s hierarchy of needs, physiological needs are the foundation.
You honor the fact that you have been created in the image of God when you take care of yourself.
So God created man and woman in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female he created them (Genesis 1:27).
6. Encourage Others
Stepping out of our own myopic perspective to serve others helps us move away from our self-focus and negativity.
This shift — texting someone an encouraging note, sending a surprise gift, meeting a need — helps us love ourselves as we love others, and shakes up the moods we are stuck in.
Therefore encourage one another and build each other up, just as in fact you are doing (1 Thessalonians 5:11).&
7. Keep a Gratitude Journal
This is almost cliché at this point. But it’s essential for a healthy outlook on life to name and keep a list of the things that are good — health, safety, sunshine, family, friends, shoes to wear, etc.
The small things are often the best things, and they can be missed in seasons of stress. But intentional gratitude — keeping an ongoing list or a phone note — brings rest and nourishment to the weary soul.
Praise the LORD, my soul; all my inmost being, praise His holy name. Praise the LORD, my soul, and forget not all His benefits — who forgives all your sins and heals all your diseases, who redeems your life from the pit and crowns you with love and compassion (Psalm 103:1-4).
8. Pay Attention to Yourself and Your Reactions
If you are overreacting to something, or reacting in impatience, anger, or in a way that seems bigger than the situation warrants, that is probably a sign that you are not okay.
Take some time to listen to the stories you are telling yourself, remind yourself of God’s story about you, and choose a reaction that is counter to what you might have done in your stress.
So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him (1 John 4:16).
9. Choose Community
Stress can cause us to isolate, zone out, escape, or numb. Try to avoid this gently. Don’t isolate. Instead, find a safe church community, join a small group, or gather with friends so that you aren’t alone.
Let us not give up the habit of meeting together, as some are doing. Instead, let us encourage one another all the more, since you see that the Day of the Lord is coming nearer (Hebrews 10:25).
Similar to my dying hair, my computer recently stopped functioning properly, and it needed an entire reset.
Sometimes, our bodies tell us what we don’t even realize — like that computer and like my “stress hair” — we need to pause, get some perspective and start over. Why? Because God loves us and wants us to experience the abundance life has to offer.
Photo Credit: ©iStock/Getty Images Plus/Daniel de la Hoz
