3 Powerful Truths Every Woman in Midlife Needs to Overcome Self-Doubt

Self-doubt often arises in three common yet critical areas, leading us to question our calling.

Life Purpose Coach, Writer, Speaker
Updated Oct 11, 2024
3 Powerful Truths Every Woman in Midlife Needs to Overcome Self-Doubt

Have you ever had a caricature drawn of yourself or seen one of someone else? The artist exaggerates your features, emphasizing traits that stand out or might be seen as imperfections. The distorted image created entertains but does not reflect your true self.
 
Like a caricature, the self-image we create often highlights our perceived weaknesses and downplays our actual strengths. This skewed picture is shaded with self-doubt. It does not reflect our true self, created "to do good works, which God prepared in advance for us to do" (Ephesians 2:10 NIV).
 
Midlife is a fruitful time for women to pursue these good works and experience God's goodness in other areas of life. We welcome the opportunities in midlife to live by and share our wisdom, discover new passions, and enjoy our family. However, midlife also brings significant life changes.
 
New seasons, such as an empty nest or retirement, can cause us to feel like we have lost ourselves and our sense of purpose.
 
New responsibilities like caregiving, funding college, or the learning curve of starting a business or ministry can lead to pressure and insecurity in our calling.
 
New normals due to health and hormone struggles or the loss of loved ones can stir up fears and uncertainty about our future.
 
Our doubts deepen as we experience many of these while pursuing our calling. Even so, we can still trust God to help us navigate the intersection of midlife and our calling.
 
Self-doubt often arises in three common yet critical areas, leading us to question our calling. If we trust our self-perceptions above God's truth, we hinder our courage, confidence, and clarity.
 
Let’s explore the lives of Gideon, Jeremiah, and Sarah and God’s responses to their self-doubt.

Arris Charles Quote
 
1. Doubting Your Identity: Am I Enough?

As we step into new seasons of our calling, it is common to have doubts about our identity. The result is usually a loss of confidence and missed opportunities. Gideon faced this doubt when God called him to deliver Israel from the Midianites. He felt inadequate and questioned his role in this new season of leadership.
 
The angel of the LORD identified Gideon as a “mighty warrior” (Judges 6:12 NIV). Gideon doubted his identity as a warrior and replied, “But how can I save Israel? My clan is the weakest in Manasseh, and I am the least in my family” (Judges 6:15 NIV). Even after being reassured of the LORD’s presence and victory, he questioned whether God was speaking and would fulfill His promises (Judges 6:17, 36-37 NIV).
 
When your calling leads you into an unfamiliar season, you may tend to question whether you are hearing God’s voice or whether He will do what He says. You might relate to how Gideon felt and define your identity based on your weaknesses or how you compare to others. Feeling inadequate or unprepared can cause you to doubt you are the right person for the task.
 
Limiting thoughts such as, "I’ve only been a wife and mom," "I’ve just done this one job," or "There’s nothing special about me" might make you wonder how God could choose you.
 
If you trust God with your feelings of inadequacy, He will give you guidance and confidence, just as He gave Gideon.
 
During Gideon’s times of doubt, God provided signs to calm his insecurity (Judges 6:17-22, 36-40 NIV). Knowing his fears, God even guided him to secretly listen to a conversation in the Midianite camp to encourage him (Judges 7:10-15 NIV). God hears us, knows our needs, and helps us to fulfill His calling for our lives.
 
Israel had 40 years of peace because Gideon stepped out in faith to accept and act upon God’s design for his identity (Judges 8:28 NIV).

God’s Response: Trust My Design

Trusting God's design can help us overcome doubts about our identity and build confidence. We doubt who we are when we do not see ourselves as God does. God's response to Gideon reminds us we are enough, just as He created us.
 
God told Gideon, “Go in the strength you have,” and “I will be with you” (Judges 6:14, 16 NIV). God wanted Gideon to trust that he was a warrior with purpose by design.
 
Trusting God’s design means embracing the identity He gives us instead of our self-perceptions. As Paul reminds us in 2 Corinthians 12:9 (NIV), His “grace is sufficient,” and His power will strengthen us even in our weakness. We can trust the truth of who God says we are and embrace our purpose in every season.

2. Doubting Your Ability: Do I Have What It Takes?

When our calling introduces new responsibilities, it is normal to experience doubt about our ability in some areas. The hesitance this causes often limits our progress. While the people in Jerusalem were in exile, Jeremiah struggled with this doubt when God called him to deliver His messages to the nations. He felt unqualified and doubted his ability to fulfill this immense new responsibility.
 
God spoke to Jeremiah, revealing, “I appointed you as a prophet to the nations.” Jeremiah doubted his ability to carry out his calling and replied, “I do not know how to speak; I am too young” (Jeremiah 1:6 NIV).
 
Like Jeremiah, you might believe you are not qualified because of limited experience or the magnitude and weight of your calling. The additional challenges of midlife can deepen doubts, increase stress, and cause you to believe you cannot fulfill your purpose.
 
Even as a woman of faith, you might be discouraged by thoughts like, "I’m not smart enough," "I can’t do this," or "People will judge me."

If you trust God when you feel unqualified or overwhelmed by obstacles, He will give you strength and courage, just as He did for Jeremiah.
 
The LORD corrected Jeremiah’s doubtful thinking, stating, “Do not say, ‘I am too young,’” and instructed him to follow His commands and not fear the people who would fight against him (Jeremiah 1:7-8, 19 NIV). “Then the LORD reached out his hand and touched” Jeremiah’s mouth and said, “I have put my words in your mouth” (Jeremiah 1:9 NIV).
 
God’s presence, provision, and protection gave Jeremiah the courage to persevere in His calling despite intense adversity. As Jeremiah relied on God’s power, he stepped into the ability he initially doubted and played a crucial role in sustaining the faith of a remnant of God’s people.

God’s Response: Trust My Power

Trusting God's power enables us to dismiss doubts about our ability and step out with courage. Like Jeremiah, we might doubt what we are capable of when we do not believe what God says we can do. God’s support of Jeremiah shows us that His presence and power are enough to pursue our calling.
 
In Jeremiah’s letter to the surviving exiles, the LORD declared, "For I know the plans I have for you…plans to prosper you and not to harm you, plans to give you hope and a future" (Jeremiah 29:11 NIV). We can trust that God plans to give us hope and a future through His power and purposes.
 
Trusting God’s power means believing we are capable despite limits, opposition, or the complexities of midlife. We can trust the truth of what God says we can do to fulfill our calling.

3. Doubting Your Future: Will God Keep His Promise?

Our calling may bring about new normals in our lives. Whether we fulfill deep longings or undesired circumstances become a reality, it is natural to feel doubt about our future. Temptation can arise to drift from God's intended path or even give up. Sarah experienced this form of doubt when God promised her the new normal of motherhood in her old age despite her inability to conceive.
 
Sarah overheard the LORD’s message to Abraham that she would have a son by the following year. She doubted this future possibility and laughed since she was beyond the age to bear children and they were both very old, thinking, “After I am worn out and my lord is old, will I now have this pleasure?” (Genesis 18:10-12 NIV)
 
Much like Sarah, you may find it hard to believe in the calling and future God promises in the face of past disappointments and present realities. As a woman in midlife, you might doubt a new vision for your life because of your age, physical limitations, or missed opportunities.
 
You might believe, “I’m too old, so it’s too late,” “I’ve made too many mistakes,” or “I’ll probably just fail again.”
 
If you trust God with your unbelief, He will give you hope and clarity as He fulfills His promise in His perfect timing, just as He did for Sarah.
 
The LORD questioned Sarah’s disbelief, asking Abraham, “Is anything too hard for the LORD?” (Genesis 18:13-14 NIV) Despite her doubt, “the LORD…did for Sarah what he had promised. Sarah became pregnant and bore a son to Abraham in his old age, at the very time God had promised him” (Genesis 21:1-2 NIV).
 
Sarah experienced laughter again. This time, it was not in doubt but for the joy of the birth of her son (Genesis 21:6). This marked the beginning of the fulfillment of God’s promise about her future that she would be blessed to become the mother of many nations (Genesis 17:16 NIV).

God’s Response: Trust My Promises

Trusting God's promises allows us to replace doubts about our future with faith and clarity in His plan. Just like Sarah, when we do not trust God’s promises, we doubt what He says is possible. God’s fulfillment of His promise to Sarah reminds us that a clear understanding of our future comes from God’s vision, not our human perspectives or circumstances.
 
"By faith, even Sarah, who was past childbearing age, was enabled to bear children because she considered Him faithful who had made the promise" (Hebrews 11:11 NIV). We can trust that God will be faithful to do what He says.
 
Trusting God’s promises means believing that He will keep His word. We can trust the truth of what God says is possible within us and our lives, including fulfilling our calling in midlife and beyond.

The Transformative Power of Trusting God

We create a caricature framed in self-doubt when we shape our self-image and future vision based on our human understanding. Trusting God invites His transformative power to reframe our perspective to reflect His truth and plan.

By strengthening their trust in God, Gideon, Jeremiah, and Sarah overcame doubts and obstacles to fulfill their destiny. Being intentional about knowing God more deeply and recognizing His voice more clearly empowers us to pursue our calling even as we navigate the changes of midlife. Proverbs 3:5-6 (NIV) reminds us, 

"Trust in the LORD with all your heart and lean not on your own understanding; in all your ways submit to him, and he will make your paths straight."

We can overcome self-doubt by trusting God’s design, trusting God’s power, and trusting God’s promises. Trusting God empowers you to grow confidence in your identity, courage in your ability, and clarity of your future.

Photo Credit: ©Unsplash/Frank McKenna

Arris CharlesArris Charles is a Life Purpose Coach, writer, and speaker passionate about helping Christian women in midlife gain clarity of their true identity and God-given purpose so they can live with more passion, confidence, and impact. Her blog and resources blend Biblical insights with practical actions to support women to become and fulfill all God purposed for them.

Connect with Arris on her website, https://liveinspiredbypurpose.com/, or through Facebook, Instagram, Linkedin, and YouTube.

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