During a quarantine, we have more time to focus on people we love, even if we can’t be with them. Mother’s Day is a wonderful opportunity to focus on Mom and to honor her. God told His people twice in the Old Testament and six times in the New Testament to “honor” parents—to remember them with respect and acknowledge their importance in life.
That doesn’t change in a pandemic.
With the lockdown, we all have more time to be creative in honoring our Mom. Some moms are no longer with us, but there are still ways to honor their memory. And while some mothers may even be difficult to love, we can still find ways to honor them and perhaps encourage loving, healthy relationships.
A unique and creative approach to honoring a living mom during this quarantine is to appeal to her five senses. Our senses are how we take things in. We can sense whether we are loved and honored through our senses.
Creation of a “Five Senses Basket” might be one option to honor Mom, or simply focus on one or more of her senses. Here are some delightful ideas in all five areas:
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1. Honor Mom by Sharing Beautiful Things
The beautiful creations of God teach us lessons about Himself that will encourage us in difficult times (Matthew 6:26-34). God cares for the birds and the lilies of the field, and He cares for His own dear children. We are beautiful, wonderfully-made creatures. When God sees us, He sees our heart—He sees us as we are, but He also sees the righteousness of Christ our Savior changing our hearts. We can use these truths to honor our mom, especially if she is a Christian. Help her see her own God-created loveliness and how the Lord is transforming her. Give a gift that says, “I see you and you are beautiful to me.”
Consider creating a “five senses basket.” The first addition could be something beautiful to behold. Lovely things that delight the eye do not need to be large or expensive—maybe a pretty antique teacup or a sparkling purse compact. Consider things she loves to do and give a gift that will bring her joy: a lovely jigsaw puzzle, a recipe book, a book by her favorite author, or new yarn for needle-crafting.
Or give her a pretty journal with the suggestion to use it as a gratitude journal, and on the flyleaf, tell her why you are grateful for her! Perhaps a beautifully-framed photo of yourself would make her smile since most mothers think their own children are the most beautiful creatures on earth! Or give a family photo.
Strength and Dignity Journal - Proverbs 31:25
If Mom honors the Lord, that is truly worthy of praise. Honor her with a beautiful hand-held mirror. Paint, Mod Podge or attach these words on the back: “Let the King be enthralled by your beauty; honor him, for he is your Lord.”
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2. Honor Mom with Words She’ll Love to Hear
Love can be heard, so can honor. Carefully-spoken and encouraging words to our mothers are beautiful and pleasing (Proverbs 25:11). We need to be intentional to honor our mom with words that will cheer her heart and encourage her during these times of struggle.
We can always send a Mother’s Day card with a tribute to our mom, but perhaps we can also share these regards with her on Facetime, Skype, Snapchat, or another video chat space. Think of a biblical truth she models well. There are plenty of ideas about a noble character in Proverbs 31:10-31.
If she is facing the pandemic bravely, tell her she is “clothed with strength and dignity, and she laughs without fear of the future,” and this is good because faith drives out fear! Or point out how her confidence as a woman who lives in the fear of God encourages people not to worry about how God will provide, or why her godly example ministers to your family. The Psalmist says, “Festoon her life with praises!—another way to say, “honor her bountifully with words.”
Consider adding one of these to her Five Senses Basket:
1) Make a music playlist of songs she would like (her tastes, not yours).
2) Record a video from all the children...or from those she has mentored or taught as a spiritual mother.
3) Give her a tape with calming music, perhaps sounds of the sea to be played as she rests or dreams.
Essential Oil Diffuser & Natural Relaxing, Soothing Sounds
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3. Honor Mom with Scents that Calm or Energize
Some moms are struggling with anxiety during the quarantine. Other moms are seemingly fearless and are ready to stay active now and move forward with purpose. What does your mother need most at this time—scents that will calm her stress or scents that will energize her?
Think about that as you consider ways to honor her because smelling is wired to the emotional area of the brain. Beyond the welcome beauty of flowers, creative options could be a bottle of her favorite perfume, essential oils, a scented bubble bath or shower gel, perfumed soap, sweet-smelling body lotion, scented Epsom salts, or an aromatic candle.
Scents often remind us of a good memory. For example, a cherry pie might evoke memories of the family cherry-picking together. A candle might cause Mom to recall a vacation, a special dinner, a cruise, or a tender conversation. Cinnamon essential oil might honor Sunday morning cinnamon rolls she prepared for the family. Chamomile might help her recall the chamomile tea shared at a tea house. No matter the scents you share, in any form, add a note about that memory.
If Mom is a Christian with a strong testimony for the Lord, honor her by telling her how her life is a Christ-like fragrance rising up to God and drawing people to the gospel of Christ. Praise the aroma of her character or faithfulness, her witness for Jesus, or her loving, good deeds that encourage others.
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4. Honor Mom with Tastes That Remind Her of Family
Food gifts are nearly always appreciated as expressions of love, especially in these difficult days. We can honor our mom by appealing to her sense of taste.
One way to do this is to make or order delivery for one of her favorite foods, or food that evokes sweet memories of childhood—maybe a special dish she made or regularly provided. Foods can remind her of family times together. Maybe a home-cooked meal might be dropped off at her doorstep during the lockdown, or a food delivery service can bring her some basics she might need.
Or add a measuring cup to the “Five Senses Basket.” Fill the cup with a special treat like nuts or chocolate, and attach a note saying, “The measure of a woman is …”—and complete that sentence with one way she deserves honor (her faith, character, kindness, love, etc.)
If she is a believer, honor her faith in God with the symbolism of food. Remind her of God’s faithfulness and that she can continue to “taste and see that the Lord is good” (Psalm 34:8), no matter her circumstances. The Bread of Life who saved her and gave her life will continue to sustain her in times of trouble. God’s words will be sweeter than honey to encourage her.
Perhaps you can honor her faith with a basket of bread and honey and a new devotional book!
What Really Matters: Faith, Hope, Love: 365 Daily Devotions from Our Daily Bread
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5. Honor Mom with Virtual Hugs and ‘Touches’ of Love
One of the sad realities of the pandemic lockdown is the separation families have felt, especially separation from elderly loved ones. During quarantine, the sense of touch is perhaps the most difficult of the five senses to use to honor our mom on Mother’s Day, but we can be creative!
By all means, hug her in person if you can. But there are ways to send virtual hugs and dispel some loneliness. The Internet is filled with family members who have stood outside windows at Mom’s house with signs or shared loving displays from the sidewalk.
Touch doesn’t require actual touching these days. Maybe a stuffed animal can be added to the “Five Senses Basket” to fill in for loved ones’ presence. Attach a note on a ribbon around the stuffed animal’s neck with the words: “Here’s a virtual hug for you!”
Reach out and touch her heart with family memories—a letter with notes from family members or a scrapbook of photos. Or set up a Zoom call with family members to honor her— including lavish “thrown” kisses and virtual hugs.
Connect with video calling and load family photos to share with your mom!
Another idea, if there are small children in the family, is to make and send “Grandma” a gift on Mother’s Day—a simple plaster of Paris handprint of her grandchildren’s hands as an ornament or wall hanging. It’s a meaningful ongoing “touch of love.”
If Mom is alone because of the quarantine and she is a woman of faith, remind her she is never truly alone if she knows Jesus. He is in our midst and will draw near to all who call on Him (Zephaniah 3:17; Psalm 145:18; Deuteronomy 31:6; Hebrews 13:5b).
All of these expressions of love are wonderful, but what about when a mom has passed away or is difficult to love? The next two slides address those issues.
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Honor Mom When She Is No Longer with You
For many, Mother’s Day is painful. We long to be with our moms, but they are no longer with us. Even if we know they are in heaven, our heart hurts.
Even if they are no longer with us, we can still choose to honor our mother. Perhaps we can start a new tradition—something we will do in her honor, like donating to or volunteering one day for her favorite charity or community project, or cooking her favorite recipes for a family meal. We might post her photo on Facebook or Instagram, honoring her with words of love.
One tradition is to write in a pretty journal each year, honoring something good we remember about our mom or a precious memory; or we might place a note each year in a special container we can appreciate all year long.
Even if the relationship was strained, or perhaps our mother did not have a relationship with Jesus, this collection of notes honoring positive qualities we saw in our moms can become a keepsake for family members—a unique inheritance beyond the wealth mentioned in Proverbs 13:22a. It may allow them, through our memories, to also appreciate the mom we love.
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Honor Mom When it Is Hard to Show Honor
In some relationships between parents and their adult children, it’s not all roses and perfume. There may not be good memories. Moms may have issues that make the relationship difficult.
But that still does not exempt us from the “honor your parents” mandate or from respecting and honoring others above ourselves (Ephesians 6:2; Romans 12:10). Honoring is an internal attitude of respect and courtesy. Honor pursues peace and attempts to build others up—even a contrary or difficult mom.
The Bible encourages Christians to be humble, gentle, and tolerant, “bearing with one another in love.” If interactions are difficult, we first need to consider whether we have added fuel to the fire, or kept score of our mother’s wrongs (1 Cor. 13:5). We may need to ask for forgiveness for our own wrong-doings as we make allowance for our mother’s faults (Colossians 3:13).
That does not mean we condone bad behavior or lie to honor our moms. Love will express appreciation for something Mom has done, or for a good quality we see in her. We can reinforce something positive with encouraging words, but we need to go beyond words with powerful deeds of love.
A sincerely-offered gift can be a key to open the door to a better relationship. Even if the gift is not accepted as we would like, we can know we have extended God’s love, and honored Him, as we sincerely attempted to honor our parent.
Discover more Meaningful Christian Mother’s Day Gifts to Inspire Mom
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Originally published Thursday, 30 April 2020.