Work, Parenting, and the Five-Year Rule
By David Chadwick
Balancing work responsibilities and being a good parent is hard. How do you harmonize these two competing priorities?
Here’s some valuable advice I’ve learned: Practice the five-year rule.
What is the five-year rule? Five years from now, who will remember what? Will your work associates remember whether you were at that meeting? Will your child remember whether you were at his event? Which is more important?
Think about it for a few seconds.
Let me give a personal illustration. Last December, my son Michael was swimming in the short course World Championships in Canada. I looked at my busy schedule. There was an elders’ meeting and the staff Christmas party.
I sighed and begrudgingly told a couple of my elder friends that I couldn’t go.
They quickly reminded me about my five-year rule. They said, “You need to go. Five years from now, who will remember whether you attended the staff Christmas party? Or the elder meeting? No one will. But Michael will remember your presence. You must go.”
My wife and I went.
Guess what happened? Michael won a gold medal as a part of the mixed medley relay team. He also won a couple of silvers and a bronze medal. These successes vaulted him to a new level of success with swimming.
And my wife and I were there to see it and celebrate his success with him.
I’d have missed this exceptionally important moment in my son’s life if I hadn’t practiced the five-year rule. How sad I’d be today if I’d missed it!
Who will remember what five years from now?
It’s been a helpful question for me to ask when trying to balance work and parenting priorities.
I hope it helps you as well.
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