How Do You Define Love?
By Lynette Kittle
“Do everything in love” - 1 Corinthians 16:14
What does it mean to do everything in love? Is that even possible? If so, what does that look like, and how do we live it out in our lives? Because God is love (1 John 4:8), the devil works overtime to distort the meaning of love by twisting it, confusing it, mixing it up, and dwindling it down to a sporadic feeling that comes and goes with a whim.
Love’s Definition
God is love, so the only way to really define and understand what love is, and how to do everything in love, requires looking at how God defines it. The following are seven ways.
1. Love reaches out first. As God demonstrated to us, love doesn’t wait to be invited before it steps out first. “We love because He first loved us”(1 John 4:19).
2. Love is a decision. Love is not an uncontrollable feeling that overwhelms us to where we can’t resist. The saying “You don’t choose who you love” is just not true.
We absolutely choose whom to love. Real love is a purposeful choice we make. As John 3:16 explains, God chose to love us. “For God so loved the world that He gave His one and only Son, that whoever believes in Him shall not perish but have eternal life.
3. Love sacrifices. Most people are looking for easy love where nothing is required of them but to be loved. But real love sacrifices for the benefit of the ones we love.
“Follow God’s example, therefore, as dearly loved children and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us and gave Himself up for us as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God” (Ephesians 5:1,2).
4. Love gives. As God has shown us by giving us Jesus, loves gives and keeps giving, as 1 John 4:9 explains, “This is how God showed His love among us: He sent his one and only Son into the world that we might live through Him.”
As well, Ephesians 1:3 describes, “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, who has blessed us in the heavenly realms with every spiritual blessing in Christ.”
5. Love covers sin. Most of us don’t truly understand how love works so powerfully in our lives. “Above all, love each other deeply, because love covers over a multitude of sins”(1 Peter 4:8).
6. Love forgives. Evidence of real love is forgiveness. Absence or lack of forgiveness reveals an unloving heart. Luke 7:47 explains, “Therefore, I tell you, her many sins have been forgiven—as her great love has shown. But whoever has been forgiven little loves little.”
Being willing to forgive reveals how much of God’s forgiveness we have received ourselves. A lack of it indicates a heart that most likely has not received the fullness of His forgiveness in our own lives.
Like Ephesians 4:32 reminds us, “Be kind and compassionate to one another, forgiving each other, just as in Christ God forgave you.” As well, Colossians 3:13 says, “Bear with each other and forgive one another if any of you has a grievance against someone. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
Many miss that forgiving others is connected to our receiving God’s forgiveness. “For if you forgive other people when they sin against you, your heavenly Father will also forgive you” (Matthew 6:14).
7. Love never fails. As 1 Corinthians 13:4-8 explains, in every situation, love doesn’t ever fail. “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no account of wrongs. Love takes no pleasure in evil, but rejoices in the truth. It bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things.”
Intersecting Faith and Life:
How does your definition of love line up with God’s description? If it doesn’t seem to match up, ask God to help you realign your view and understanding with His word.
Further Reading:
Is it True that Love Never Fails?
Photo credit: ©GettyImages/kieferpix
Lynette Kittle is married with four daughters. She enjoys writing about faith, marriage, parenting, relationships, and life. Her writing has been published by Focus on the Family, Decision, Today’s Christian Woman, kirkcameron.com, Ungrind.org, StartMarriageRight.com, and more. She has a M.A. in Communication from Regent University and serves as associate producer for Soul Check TV.
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