Gentleness in a Harsh World
By Whitney Hopler
"Let your gentleness be evident to all. The Lord is near." – Philippians 4:5 NIV
When I volunteered at my children's elementary school, I met a student named Victor, who shared some comic strips he had created with me. "In this story, the superheroes are talking, not fighting," he said. "They're talking about how to solve their problem instead of beating each other up." I congratulated Victor on the good ideas he portrayed in the comic strips. Ever since I had seen Victor crying because some kids in his class had teased him for his gentleness, I tried to encourage Victor to see his gentleness as a strength rather than a weakness. He told me that the students who made fun of his gentle nature thought he was weak. However, he added, "I'm just trying to be a gentleman, and my parents say that's a good thing." I urged Victor to share his comic strips with his teacher and the whole class. After he did so, more students came to appreciate the value of gentleness.
It's often easier to find harshness than gentleness in our fallen world. People often speak mean words to each other or post harsh messages on social media. Arguments abound, and conflicts rage on as people mistreat each other. Battles for power and control are all around us. Violence is in the news regularly.
Yet Jesus continues to call us to be gentle in this harsh world. Jesus models gentleness as a sign of strength. In Matthew 11:29 NIV, Jesus encourages us to follow his example, saying: "Take my yoke upon you and learn from me, for I am gentle and humble in heart, and you will find rest for your souls." Matthew 21:5 NIV describes how Jesus entered Jerusalem as a king in a way that emphasizes gentle strength: "See, your king comes to you, gentle and riding on a donkey."
God is gentle with us. He gives us unlimited and unconditional love. He answers our prayers according to what's best for us. He extends grace and mercy to us whenever we ask for it. Since God – who is the source of all strength – treats us with gentleness, we can see how gentleness is truly a sign of strength when we look to God's example.
Despite the world's harshness, gentleness is an asset, not a liability. Gentleness is the foundation of important "soft skills" that can help us succeed personally and professionally – skills such as humility, compassion, respect, and listening. When we're gentle, we welcome God's love to flow through our lives.
It may not be popular to be gentle in this harsh world. However, it's important for us all to learn how to be gentle. Thankfully, the Holy Spirit will teach us how to do so. Galatians 5:22-23 NIV lists gentleness as one of the "fruits of the Spirit" we can develop by working with the Holy Spirit to learn and grow. Making that effort will unleash more of God's power into our lives, freeing us from fear, strengthening our faith, and showing others God's love in action. The more we choose gentleness in our words and actions, the more like Jesus we become – and the more others will notice his love flowing through our lives.
Intersecting Faith and Life:
As you reflect on being gentle in our harsh world, consider these questions:
- In what ways have you been conditioned to believe gentleness is a sign of weakness? How can you work with the Holy Spirit to change your mind and start seeing gentleness as a sign of strength?
- What can you learn from Jesus' example of how to embody gentleness as a sign of strength?
- When have you witnessed someone show gentleness in a challenging situation? How did that impact the people involved?
- How can you practice gentleness toward yourself, and how can that self-compassion help you to be more gentle toward others?
- When you encounter stressful situations, how can you respond with gentleness rather than react in anger?
- How can you be more intentional about showing gentleness toward the difficult people in your life?
- How can you encourage others to embrace gentleness as a sign of strength rather than weakness? How can you model that behavior for those around you?
Further Reading:
Photo Credit: ©Getty Images/Tom Merton
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