Are You Building a Resume or a Legacy?
By Whitney Hopler
“Many are the plans in a person’s heart, but it is the Lord’s purpose that prevails.” - Proverbs 19:21 NIV
Staring at my maternal grandmother’s grave at Arlington National Cemetery in Virginia, I was struck by how inadequate the words on her tombstone were to summarize her life: “Pauline M. Dodson, His Wife, March 28 1912, January 26 2008.”
Beyond her birth and death dates, all her tombstone revealed to those who didn’t know Nana personally was that she had been married to Grandpa. His stone gave only a bit more information — the dates of his lifetime and his military resume basics: “Lieutenant (JG), U.S. Coast Guard, World War II.” The tombstones gave one story, but my memories of Nana and Grandpa presented a far different story.
Grandpa had an impressive resume, filled with accomplishments at top military and civilian jobs. Grandpa’s legacy, though, was unfortunately full of estranged relationships. He was often cold and distant, and he could be mean. He worked a lot yet invested little time in the relationships that matter most. After work, he often sat alone on a sofa watching TV and drinking beer, even though he had plenty of opportunities to live more fully.
Nana had very little to put on a resume other than “homemaker.” However, Nana invested her life in legacy values. She became known as someone people could confide in — someone who would listen well and care. No matter what else was on her schedule as a mom of four children and grandmother to many, Nana made it a top priority to help people. She generously gave her time, energy, and money when she could. She was a peacemaker, too, helping people resolve conflicts with each other. Her tombstone doesn’t say any of that.
When I reflected on both of their lives, I didn’t think in terms of facts that would appear on a resume, such as dates or occupations. Instead, what naturally came to mind about them were the different legacies they had left behind.
Legacies are all about love since love is what matters most in life. In Matthew 22:37-40 NIV, Jesus describes how love is what’s most important for people to focus on: “…‘Love the Lord your God with all your heart and with all your soul and with all your mind.’ This is the first and greatest commandment. And the second is like it: ‘Love your neighbor as yourself.’ All the Law and the Prophets hang on these two commandments.”
We can fulfill God’s purposes for our lives well by simply doing our best to put love into action. Day by day, as we let God’s love flow through our lives, we can build strong legacies. So, what will our legacies be? If we’re too busy building our resumes, we won’t have time and energy left to build our legacies.
Too often, our society celebrates resume values — work accomplishments — over everything else in life. We’ll likely be asked first when meeting someone new: “What do you do?” as if our jobs are our identities and our value will be measured by the number of our work achievements. We’ll encounter pressure to spend our limited time and energy working so hard that we’re too exhausted to do much else. We can easily find ourselves alive, yet not fully living.
It’s by pursuing legacy values that we can really thrive. The values that build strong legacies are those that involve living fully with God and other people, like: praying and meditating, enjoying adventures in nature, helping each other, expressing gratitude, passing along grace and mercy, pursuing joy, and worshipping with wonder.
We may be accomplishing a lot in our careers — or not. Regardless, what truly matters is whether or not we’re relating to other people with love. That kind of choice, repeated every day, will point us toward our purposes and help us build positive legacies. It’s our legacies, not our resumes that matter most.
Intersecting Faith and Life:
As you reflect on pursuing what matters most in your life, consider these questions:
- Have you been focusing mostly on resume values or on legacy values, and why?
- What changes can you make to your schedule to focus less on work and more on love?
- How can you prioritize building the legacy you’d like to leave behind?
- What are some ways you can plan to express love to people regularly through your words?
- What are some ways you can plan to express love to people through your actions?
Further Reading:
Photo credit: ©Getty/WestEnd61
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